Competing in Miss America is an experience like no other. Quite literally thousands of women a year compete to be one of the 52 who grace the stage of the Miss America competition, held once a year in Atlantic City, NJ in September.

For those who are new followers, you may not know, but I got my chance to compete as Miss Indiana 2009. I competed in what are known as “The Vegas Years,” when Miss America moved from it’s September in Atlantic City routine to host the pageant in January in Las Vegas.

As a transplant into UK culture, pageants are not one of those things that equally translate. You see, in the US, every young girl gets her chance to watch a pageant on TV several times a year. There are many to choose from – Miss USA, Miss Universe, and Miss America are the big three. But here in the UK, pageants aren’t a rite of passage, which leads to such a curiosity from my new British friends.

In this pageant series, I’ll explain a bit about my pageant experience within the Miss America Organization (mostly for simplicity, as I’ve competed in three other systems). In this post, specifically I’ll share about my experiences before the culmination of my time competing in the actual Miss America Pageant. You see, most people don’t know there are years and years of work that go into competing for such a prestigious title, and there is definitely an ugly side to competing in pageantry.

Miss America Organization – The Basics

I always feel like I have to lead with the fact that this is not Toddlers and Tiaras. I personally started competing when I was 16, and the Miss America Organization attracts the best of the best of young women – goal oriented, educated, talent, well-spoken, volunteer-minded, down-to-earth, accomplished women. Whatever pageant stereotypes you’ve heard before, get rid of them because these women are nowhere near those misconceptions.

Every Miss America contestant starts at the local level. Throughout each state, local pageants are held most weekends of the year, and these local winners advance to compete at the state level. The state winners then go on to compete for the title of Miss America.

The judging criteria is the same at the local, state, and national level; and the contestants are judged on interview (a panel interview with 5 judges), talent (90-seconds of an on-stage talent), onstage questions (1-2 questions about a variety of topics), evening gown, and swimsuit.

The Miss America Organization (MAO) is a scholarship competition (and the nation’s leading women’s scholarship provider), so any money won by a contestant must be paid directly into her university or other education. Every contestant at Miss America wins a scholarship and the winner earns $50,000 toward her education.

All contestants are 17 to 25 years of age and must be U.S. citizens, along with following several other rules outlined in the contract.

Every MAO titleholder spends her year as a titleholder in a “year of service.” This isn’t just fancy pageant talk; it’s the real deal. These women spend hundreds (if not thousands) of hours a year volunteering for their communities and implementing their personal platforms to make a real and marked difference in the world.

How I Got My Start in Pageants

I grew up watching the big three pageants on television, like every young girl across America, but I never made the connection that the women onstage could one day be me. As a junior in high school, I was busy applying for scholarships to go to university and was tired of writing essay after essay and winning (if I was lucky) only $500-1000 at a time.

About that time, a friend of mine had just won the title of Indiana’s Junior Miss and came back to school talking about how she had just won $10,000 in scholarships. In one week. By performing a talent onstage. That sounded like way more fun than writing another essay!

The next year, I competed in Indiana’s Junior Miss and won, earning $9,275 in scholarships at the local and state level. I was hooked, and I was slowly paying for my education. After passing on my title the next year, I started competing in the Miss America system, eventually earning over $35,000 in scholarships toward my education.

Fourth Time’s A Charm

I competed for Miss Indiana a total of four years, all of which gave me such a different and well-rounded perspective on pageant competition. I fully believe God’s timing is perfect, and had I won earlier, I would not have been as prepared for Miss America as I was.

Miss South Central was my first MAO local pageant. By some stroke of luck, I won the first MAO pageant I entered (and believe me when I say it was luck; you should see all the photos) and was blessed with wonderful directors who helped me fully transition my styling and personal brand to fit within the Miss Indiana “look.” I followed every direction they gave me and ended up placing in the top 10 at Miss Indiana that year.

After Miss Indiana, I knew I wanted to continue, that my dream wasn’t over after one year, so I immediately entered the first local competition I was eligible for and won the title of Miss Hoosier Heartland. This director really pushed me out of my comfort zone to help improve my interview, polish my talent to be more relatable, and transform into the “it girl” that the Miss America head office kept saying they wanted. I completely transformed my wardrobe and song that year and ended up winning talent and swimsuit, placing first runner-up to Miss Indiana (who went on to place first runner-up to Miss America that year).

The huge jump in placement was a reassurance that I could one day be Miss Indiana. The next year, I waited months to compete for the Miss North Central pageant (now the Miss Metropolitan pageant) in the spring. I’d had a bit of a disaster with my evening gown the year before, so we purchased a gorgeous Tony Bowls gown and kept literally everything else the same – same song, same clothes – just polished my interview and H&M. And once again, I won the talent award and placed first runner-up to Miss Indiana Katie Stam (who went on to win Miss America, our state’s first!).

During Katie’s homecoming, I performed “And This Is My Beloved” from Kismet and absolutely fell in love with the piece, so during my final year at Miss Indiana (competing as Miss Duneland) the only change I made was my song choice, mostly to keep myself interested. While this was the only change I made to the competition itself, I came in with a totally different mindset. I was finally relaxed and extremely comfortable with who I was and what I had to offer. I knew I had what it took to be able to win Miss Indiana, and I was ready to show the judges the real Nicole. That year, I not only won the talent award for the third time, but I also won interview and the title of Miss Indiana.

With all four sets of directors, and the support of my family and so many other wonderful individuals, my dream had come true. I was headed to Miss America!

The Highs And Lows

I’m asked often what the best and worst parts of being in pageants are, and there is only one response: PEOPLE.

The sisterhood within the Miss America Organization is one like no other. I spoke about this when I was giving up my Miss Indiana title, but I was never part of a formal sorority at university. My “sorority” was the Miss Indiana pageant and the women who I saw every weekend at volunteer events and local pageants. They were my sisters and 2/3 of my bridesmaids when I got married.

I am so grateful for the opportunity to develop these strong friendships with women who are so educated, loyal, supportive, and accomplished. Even just today, as Hurricane Irma showed her wrath, devastating the Virgin Islands, Miss District of Columbia updated our Facebook group with reports that Miss Virgin Islands is safe and will update us with how we can all help once Hurricane Jose passes. That is a pretty incredible thing to be a part of.

The volunteers who give their time and efforts to the Miss America program are also the pinnacle of selflessness and such a bright light in the pageant world. They give their heart and soul to the development of the young women who participate, and frankly, they deserve the accolades of the crown far more than any of us.

But with the wonderful people also come the trolls. With the invention of the internet, everyone has an opinion, and too often the opinions are anonymous. As a pageant contestant, even before you win a local, you’ve got to have thick skin and unfazed confidence. Immediately, you’re thrust into the spotlight and will hear comments on your appearance, your platform choice, how real or fake you are, your weight, your competitiveness, your talent. “Friends” from high school will crawl out of the woodwork to write disparaging comments on news articles about your win.

But quickly, you learn that your value doesn’t lie in the opinions of others, which I fully believe is one of the greatest gifts pageants has given me. Because I heard or read every negative comment about myself and knew I was better than the pettiness and hatred, my confidence became entwined with the person I knew I was and the job I knew I could do, rather than the statements made about me. Every pageant contestant is faced with this harsh reality, but I know it’s also given me the confidence to stick my neck out and take risks without worrying about the opinions of others.

It is these lessons and the strong relationships that inspired me to start my pageant coaching and image consulting business. I know first hand what it feels like to go through this tough growth process, and it is vital that the young women competing today have strong and uplifting people to guide them toward success, just like I did.

American friends, be sure to watch this year’s Miss America Pageant live from Boardwalk Hall in Atlantic City, NJ on ABC at 9/10c Sunday, September 11th.

Stay tuned for Part 2: My Miss America Experience, Part 3: My Year As Miss Indiana, and Part 4: Life Lessons I Learned From Pageants. Have a topic you want to see on Holly Tree Cottage? Comment below! I’d love to hear your thoughts!